Blessings & Dreams unfolded.

GOD IS BLESSING ME BEYOND BELIEF nd I have nothing but amazement and awe in my heart. I have no choice but to Praise Him for his goodness and mercies. Every minute of every day I thank Him for the things he is providing, for the things he is revealing and who his is molding me to be. 

The challenge is over and I have been struggling with feeling somewhat empty!  For those of you who have been reading my blog all along, you read the previous post about Try Sports when they donated my shoes and one of my dreams for the future was to be on the Team Believe. Achieve for Try Sports. I did not think it would be in the near future by any means. I still run ridiculously slow and still have 105 pounds left to lose until I reach my goal but this past week I was hit with the realization that things do not have to be perfect for great opportunities to happen and for me to take advantage of them. 

I was very surprised this week to have an email from the Mount Pleasant Try Sports store (go there!!) asking me to be a part of the Try Sports Ambassador Team: Team Believe Acheive! I about peed my pants when I read the email! MY DREAM HAS COME TRUE!! I don't know all the details yet. I just know I get to run a bunch of races and help promote healthy lifestyle at events and wear the official uniform... and I am just dern excited!! AND HONORED! Humbled even. I am kind of laughing inside because I am not a fast runner and will not be bringing home prizes for them most likely- but they want me because I am a positive role model for healthy life and for the Try Sports mission. What a blessing!  I'll let you know more details. 

All I have to say is YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! lol

So here is my new challenge: Team Believe Achieve! 

God is so good!

Picture Updates

This is 3 members of my team and two supporters who did it in the past. This was the first time we did the bridge at the beginning of the challenge (3 days into the challenge). 

Here I am. This is what I look like at a 44.2 lb loss after the healthy charleston challenge!

I have one of our team from the win last night that I will be getting emailed to be soon! :) Thanks! Love you all!

VICTORY!!! :) Starting a new chapter...

It's hard to believe that it is over! The MUSC Healthy Charleston Challenge had our official final weigh in tonight and I so incredibly awed and pleased to announce that I WON overall for females for top % of weight loss and was also incredibly blessed to be a part of the TOTAL APPROACH/Anderson Insurance who took first place! 

I have been through and experienced many amazing things in my life... but I think this, by far, has been the most life changing. I am so thankful for the things I learned during the Healthy Charleston Challenge and for all of the people I met. Katie St Clair is the best trainer possible and Julie Puchetti (my mentor and one of my best friends) is the most amazing, encouraging and inspiring woman. I could not PRAISE GOD enough for his goodness and for these amazing people. I am completely thankful for Janis Newton and the program that she started at MUSC. If anyone is in the area and looking FOR REAL for a way to lose weight- not any gimmics or easy fix its but rather a real life style change- please look into the Healthy Charleston Challenge at MUSC. 

As I weighed in tonight and worked out all week- I was praying for a 5 lb week so I could stand a chance at winning. I actually started eating a lot more this week. I bumped my calories up to 1300 to 1400 a day since my metabolism was speeding up. Obviously, it was successful this week! I mainly though think it was a great God who helped with my tremendous weight loss this week. This week I killed my 5 pound goal by losing 9.2 pounds this week alone! That leaves me with a final total of 44.2 pounds during the healthy charleston challenge!! What an amazing victory! 44.2 pounds!! In TEN weeks!! I am so excited about my new life and making a healthy start for me and for my future family! I am a much better person because of this new direction I am taking in my life. I can now glorify God better, love others and myself more fully and really just be thankful for who I am. 

Thank you to all of you who have read this and encouraged me... whether it was through prayers, encouragement or some of you even financially. There were times when I needed things, even money for healthy groceries, and the Lord provided. I am so thankful for  Try Sports and their staff in Mount Pleasant. They provided my shoes, socks and even more (I am eternally grateful!!!)  There are still many needs that I have but unlike before the challenge, I no longer doubt the Lords provision. I know he is going to provide my bike for me that I need to begin training for triathlons as well as the money for a gym membership so I can continue on towards my goal. I hit and surpassed my goal of 40 pounds for the Healthy Charleston Challenge but my overall goal is 150 pounds and I have quite a long journey left to travel.

I am so thankful for this 10 week journey but it is not over yet. I feel a bit empty that it is over and I think it is going to be a struggle transitioning to being in a team and structured program to being on my own. But I know that I am very blessed to have been a part of an amazing team with a phenomenal trainer-- I will not be alone. I will need your encouragement now in the near future more than ever before!!

I know some of you are curious what I won and were asking... 

for my team winning, we all received a massage, a gold pass to all the county parks for a year and one hundred dollars.

for me winning top female, I won 50 dollars, some training sessions with my trainer, and then there were two prizes for the tip top of the two winners (male and female). One was a bike and one was a signed NFL football by Joe Namath. For those of you who have been keeping up with the blog and talking with me, I really really really wanted to win the bike. The male had a higher % than me so he got to pick first-- he picked the bike. I was so sad!! I don't even know who Joe Namath is (haha- and everyone there thought it was a crime that I did not) but apparently it's worth TONS of money so hopefully I can get some good money out of it on e-bay or something so I can buy my bike, maybe help get my membership for a year and hopefully some to help bless a team member of mine too who is really on my heart.

I am so excited and thankful. For everything! Praise God is the only thing that has reigned over in my mind again and again and again. :) His steadfast love endures forever!

EEEK!!! :)

This is it! 3 more days... (not even..)

I did not think I even had a chance of winning the Healthy Charleston Challenge but this is proof that you should never count yourself out even at the very end. So far this week, I have lost so much weight and I am really close to where the top winner for % was last week. I had hit a slump point where I had slowed down some in weight loss-- but I started eating more calories since my motabolism is up and I have lost more. I am so excited! Please send more prayers for me. I know this may seem silly but it's so exciting to me. I know whether I win or not that I am victorious and have already won. My goal for the challenge was to lose 40 pounds and I am positive that I am going to hit that goal and go beyond. I am so excited about my future and how much better my life is going to be because of these decisions I made and will continue to make.

Trucking it to the end...

I just got finished running a 5K in mount pleasant! I was thinking while I was running how amazing it is that I could run 3 miles straight though-- slowly, may I remind you-- but non stop at least. I could not even run one lap around the track when I first started. I thought I was going to dye going up one flight of stairs and I just ran 3.1 miles! All things are possible... moving towards the 8K on thanksgiving day with my brother in Charlotte. 

As I enter this last week of the challenge, I am trying to push myself as much as possible so that I finish with a bang. At our weigh in on thursday, I lost 2.4 pounds with a total of 35 pounds lost in the MUSC Healthy Charleston Challenge program. What an amazing success that is. I may not win this whole thing but boy have I jumped over a huge hurtle that I never thought I could. In my mind I have set a 40 pound goal for the program so I am hoping to lose 5 this week. :) We will see! 

The festival of lights run on thursday was AMAZING! If you are in the area- you need to go do it next year. It was so beautiful and so much fun! The lights distract you from thinking the negative thoughts of "this hurts..." or "I can't go any more..."  I ran the 2 miles in 23.39 which is really good for me. I think I was super fast that day. My time today was a lot slower... around 41 minutes... but I kept a fairly consistent mile pace so that is good. Lots of room for improvement and am so excited about getting better and better! 

CHEERS for the last week of the challenge. If you don't mind, I'd appreciate some extra prayers...even though it's silly even some prayer that I lose my 5 pounds so I reach my goal... I love you all and I cannot do this without you!

Wrapping up the Healthy Charleston Challenge...

I cannot believe that the healthy charleston challenge is over almost! We only have one week left after weigh in tonight. Next thursday, the 19th, will be our last weigh in and the winners will be annouced. It blows my mind how fast it has gone by. I am really sad about it being over and am going to need some major support and encouragement to keep me pushing forward towards my goal! The lack of the team and compeition will make it difficult but I am excited about keeping that comrodery up with my team and all of us reaching our over all goals! It will be an exciting day!

Lots of things went on this week and I feel like I have not posted in forever! I was having a lot of foot, knee, hip, back and neck pain & discomfort. I went to see a physical medicine and rehabilitation doctor. She saw me and nothing seemed to be terribly wrong structure wise with the exception of me having "hideious posture." Haha- those were her exact words! :) She did recognize though that there were a lot of issues going on with muscles and things that needed to be worked out. She recommended deep tissue massage and physical therapy 1-2 times a week. RIght now- I am not in a position to be able to afford that because I have not met my insurance deductable so I am trying to figure out the next best solution to get these things fixed so they don't turn from minor issues to major issues. I know the Lord is going to provide a cheaper solution to the problem and that I am strong and healed in His name.

This week has been frustrating. Thus far in the program, I really have not had any struggle with eating right or working out-- this week, I have eaten well but I have really struggled with keeping a good food log. And I just don't feel quite driven in my workouts like I was. This is not good with only a week left in the challenge. I still feel like I worked out a lot and ate right enough to lose the needed weight for the week but had hit a major plateau this week. Nothing had gone off. It actually had gone up a tiny bit since last week's weigh in. I was so frustrated but I decided to give it up to God and finally last night when I weighed I was down for the week. We shall see how I come out tonight at the weigh in.

I am excited about tonight! Everyone in the challenge is going to run the James Island Festival of Lights 2 Mile run!! I get to run in all kinds of beautiful christmas lights at the park with amazing people I love! I am really pumped!! I have a lot of races coming up so please be praying for me!

Upcoming Races:
Tonight- Festival of Lights
Saturday- Harbor something...run.. in mt pleasant with katie lesslie!!
Thanksgiving- 8k with my brother at the Charlotte Turkey Trot.

Should be fun! Will update you on the weigh in sometime this weekend! Thanks for reading!!

Getting my mind right...

I am so blessed to have a trainer that not only cares for me and my team as far as our health and weigh loss but one who cares about us as a whole. She really observes her team and pours herself into us-- she loves us enough to tell us things that benefit us when we need it most.

So my mind has not been right. Overall- I will say I have done really well with staying positive throughout the challenge. I think if I were to compare myself to how I thought/acted this time last year, I would have no choice but to say that I have grown tremendously. But sometime in the last 2 weeks perhaps- my mind has shifted. When I was not in the top 5 for % lost- I would be devastated and just get so negative.  I became obsessed with winning.  Yes- I still would like to win mainly because I really want a bike and cannot afford one other wise but my mind was in the wrong place and I am so thankful for a little help in getting back to where I need to be; not so that I can win the program but so I can say that I gave it my all and have won the battle in my mind that has been an issue for almost all of my life.

The bike... not going to lie... would make me incredibly happy. But the weight. The poor self image. The feeling of not being worth anything. All of those things, that baggage, that I have carried around for my whole life- are quickly fading away. That is what is the real prize. The real prize is overcoming where I was and breaking the bondage that had such a tight grip on me before. Thank GOD I entered this program and I am learning to love me--who I was, who I am and who I am becoming; bike-less or not. :) 

I am praying to God that Katie (my trainer) does not get upset that I post some of her message that she sent to me. It was very personal but it really set me free and as I re-read it and meditate on it- it continues to set my mind and spirit free. Katie- I know you read this sometimes- so please for give me but in my heart I feel like there are people who read this that will be set free from this as well. It was meant for me but it is so applicable to each and every person in each and every struggle or strong hold in your life. Katie... thank you. 

"Positive thoughts bring positive results. Negative thoughts, low self esteem, blame, shame, fear are what have led to the negative path your life has been on up until now. Take control of your thoughts before it's too late. It's time to let go of it all. Let go of the negativity, the should do wish I could or wish I was. Let go of all the pain. Don't waste time. Be the person you want to be right now. Be happy, be positive, make every thought, action and word you speak positive and your results will be positive.  I could list a million reasons why I think you are great but it doesn't mean anything until you start to believe it in yourself and project it to everyone. Who cares about the top 5- you've changed your whole life, made a new group of truly supportive friends, learned how to eat well, exercise and continue to do so.  When your head is right you'll be able to accomplish anything. You only get one life so don't waste a minute of it not being happy or at least trying to be happy.  And if all else fails do something for somebody less fortunate than you."   W0w- what an incredibly wise and encouraging woman. 

Weigh in update-

I lost 2.6 pounds this week for a total of 32.6.    117.4 pounds left to go until I reach my goal.

I have such a large goal but I have set some smaller goals to help me along the way. I have selected pieces of clothing to help. About 3 weeks ago I bought a yoga coat on sale at old navy. It is a L. I have worn XXL clothes at ON for as long as I can remember but I bought it as a goal and I can now wear it!! What a good feeling!  So today I was at goodwill and decided to look for more goal clothes- I got two really nice work out shirts (nike and columbia)- one is a small and one a medium so those will be hung up to motivate me now. :) 

This past weekend was the NYC marathon- me, along with a few team mates, decided that we are going to do it next year! (gotta start saving pennies now!) We have set some small goals along the way. This coming thursday, our team is running the James Island Festival of Lights Run- 2 miles. I am so excited about the christmas lights and being with my team! Then that saturday, Katie Miller and I will be doing a 5K in Mt. Pleasant! I am so blessed to have the chance to run with one of my dearest friends and encouragers! :) Then THANKSGIVING!! Then back here for the Reindeer Run. My midway point goal will be the Bridge run 10K. Very excited and thankful.

Another thing Katie had me do was list 10 ways my life has changed because of the program and then 10 things I have always criticized myself about in the past/currently and then change them to a positive. Some of these are extremely personal.... I have really debated on putting them on... but you know what transparency inspires.... and I am trusting with my heart. I am thankful to a God who gives grace and uses my struggles- and one thing I do know is when you are open, trusting and completely transparent/honest-- you are able to heal and overcome a lot better. Here is my trusting to anyone to stumbles across this page..

Ten Ways My Life Has Changed for the Better during this program:

1) I am happier than I have ever been.

2) I am starting to love myself and my life.

3) I am not struggling with depression like I was - no longer take anti depressants, thoughts of not wanting to live, etc. I am happy to be alive and be me.

4) I am doing things that I never thought I could/would do but always wanted to (run, do future events such as triathlon etc.) - building belief in myself.

5) I have found that I can inspire people and motivate people- I always thought I was a no body who would never be used. 

6) I am motivated and excited about something for the first time in a long time.

7) I have met amazing friends who encourage me and support me through our team & found how much others outside of the team are a support system.

8) No longer feeling trapped in circumstances: I am breaking the bondage that being fat has had on me and my mom.

9) I have gained the ability to help others and encourage others become healthy and overcome things they don't like about themselves.

10)  I am stronger physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. 

Ten Criticisms to Positives

1) I am worthless and never good enough for anything. -- I am good enough & of priceless worth. I am improving every single day.

2) No one loves me; I am never going to get married. -- I am learning to love myself which will help people love me and help me love others. When I love myself, my spouse will come soon after.

3) I am fat and ugly -- I am a beautiful child of God created in his image inside and out. I am working hard every single day to be my best healthy self.

4) I am stupid-  I am becoming stronger in mind and body. I am developing a positive mental attitude that can help me achieve all things.

5) I am a disappointment to my family -- my family was proud of me before and they are thankful that I am now choosing to become the best me possible. 

6) I am lazy -- I am full of energy all the time and always take advantage of time to be productive and active!

7) I wear huge  clothes- I am shrinking every single day that I work out and eat right! I am working to be happy with my size. I'm slim and fit.

8) I hate the way my stomach looks- My stomach is getting smaller and firmer every day I work out and eat right.

9) I hate the way my skin looks- As I become healthier inside and out, my skin will become healthier too.

10) I hate how fat my legs/thighs are- My legs are getting thinner and stronger every day I work out. 

11) I don't believe in myself - Every day I take action and work on myself I build belief in who I am and that I am capable of all things of JC who gives me strength.

There you go... the real me. 

Thanks for loving and reading!

Fitness/Strength Progress:

Last week-- Mile time was 13.42 /Stair time was 28 seconds

This week-- Mile time was 12.51/Stair time was 24 seconds

Making improvements!  :) 

Updated Pictures of Me

Many of you have asked to see updated pictures of me. I have posted here three pictures of what I used to look like (through out the past year) and then two from halloween this weekend so you can see where I am to this day.  Lately, I have really been struggling with my self image. I have to really remember what it was I looked like, what progress I have made and think about what progress I will make in the future. 

Even though these were not taken for purpose of showing how I have changed (they were taken for halloween trunk or treat at school on friday)-- but they show how I have changed fairly well. And it's fun because I went as an 80's fitness instructor. :) How appropriate. "Let's get physical!" :)